Hello and welcome to the most pathetic room on Camsoda. I'm 40 and celibate for years. I made this choice after finding that the majority of men have only wanted me for my body and I rationalize camming for many reasons. One, this is my biggest ef you to the world! I have been made to feel like a series of holes by the majority of men that I have come across in my life so if you're going to treat me like a whore then I expect you to pay me like one. I do not do casual encounters or meetups. I'm not scort I am a cam slut. Here to keep you company, entertain you, and help you bust a nut. If you're REALLY trying to get to know me, there are only 2 ways in which it will work and that is by stimulating my mind and being LOYAL. Other than that, it's all just a nut or casual companionship. I got into camming many years ago because I was in a car accident, someone rear ended me, my ex bf was abusive, and I needed to get the hell away from him. It is difficult for me to keep a schedule or sit at a desk all day. I'm confused and I'm not sure what I'm doing. I have a B.S. in Biology and was pre-med but wver, that's down the drain now. I have chronic pain and trauma so this is why I don't usually cam for more than a few hours. My neck and entire back fucking hurts constantly. Camming has allowed me to work around my health issues and still survive on my own because disability just doesn't pay enough and I feel bad to even apply. I mean, would you think I was "disa?" I'm not a mooch but I guess I am lucky that I can pull off camming cause I'm not sure WTF I would've done all these years if I weren't an attractive female. I had no one to help me. I grew up poor and have been taking care of myself since I was 19 years old. What's next? Well, I do have a confession, although I love going private because I prefer one on one time and can be most free there, I usually ask because my back hurts and I just want to lay back in missionary to rest it :/ It's double the pleasure for me. I don't do missionary in public because I don't like freeloaders watching me doing stuff that is a privilege for them to watch that they have not earned so fuck em! I wish more models would think this way as this sets the tone for "freeloading" to be okay or something. Nope, not in this room. You get to see what is on the tip menu, wheel, or what I CHOOSE TO SHOW. I do not deviate. Everything extra in ticket show or private only. Men will get away with ever you let them get away with so this is why my boundaries are strict and I don't give AF who I offend. This room is not for the weak! I'm very nice but I treat you exactly how you treat me. If you turn me off, I will return the fucking favor. Okay? I do not tolerate immature behavior and I'm not here to teach you how to act like a fucking adult. I'm not for everyone and not everyone is for everyone anyways so if you can't handle it then see your way outta here and peace be with you if you. Here's another best kept secret, I put on a smile for the camera but cry every single day multiple times a day behind the scenes. Don't worry, I'm getting better. Now I cry maybe 1 or 2 times a day. Progress. What else would you like to know? Am I a great actress? No. If I were, I would be working in Hollywood at this point. All happiness that you see while I'm here is genuine because YOU bring me to life. I am alone all of the time. And I'm not telling you this for pity, I do not like pity. This is why I don't talk about it much. I'm telling you this so you can understand who I am and why I do certain things. It's NOT to be difficult. I'm sure many of you are completely unaware about any of this and many might just think I'm lazy, entitled, or have a life. Nope. The truth is, I'm depressed, traumatized and have a lot of intense chronic pain pretty much all of the time. I won't take prescribed pain meds for fear of addiction so I just deal with it and waste my life away instead. Being here is the only time that I socialize. I would charge less but I should probably charge more! I know the market prices on here, I've shopped around but I live in the USA and my cost of living is 7x that of the majority of models on this site. Don't compare me, and don't ask me to lower my prices. I offer private discounts from time to time. Take advantage of it when you see it but that's about it. If I'm away for long periods of time it's because I'm sad, anxious, and don't have the energy to pull your teeth for a few tokens. I'm also going through something that is REALLY FUCKED UP on top of all of this. If you're a part of it go fuck yourself straight to hell psychos. I shouldn't even be doing this, I had many ambitions but my life slowly fell apart over the years, insurance companies are literal sociopathic scammers then we had a pandemic in which I think affected everyone but both saved me and hurt me at the same time. More regression. All through this, I HAVE HAD NO ONE TO HELP ME AT ALL EXCEPT YOU GUYS! Thank you SO SO MUCH!!! Your support and companionship means everything to me! I know this may be hard to believe but it's the truth and do with it as you wish. Anyways, enough with the pity party, I hope you still have a boner and I apologize if I blew it and not in the right way :/ I hope you can forgive me and have fun with me on cam while I'm here!